I’m an October baby, (hello fellow Libras!) and I just turned 45-years-old. Usually, I’m a big believer in celebrating birthdays. But this year, I am more into reflecting on the lessons life has taught me than celebrating.

I’m sure some of that has to do with the fact that my mother-in-law passed away unexpectedly a few months ago. The pain and sadness of this loss are still raw. And the other reason is, at 45-years-old, I have officially hit middle age.

I’m not going to lie. The idea of turning 45 is freaking me out. This age means I’m just FIVE years away from 50. And, I don’t know, when I was younger, like 25, FIFTY seemed so OLD. But now that I’m a 45-year-old woman, it seems like a big fat joke that I’ll soon reach that storied age.

I’d like to be able to say that now that I’m 45, I have it all figured out. But I don’t. I still have dreams I want to achieve, goals on my list, and complicated questions about big life decisions. So yeah, sometimes, I kinda, sorta, still feel like I’m in my late twenties. Can anyone else in their forties relate?

That said, I am grateful for the path my life has taken and what I have learned along the way.

So in lieu of celebrating this year, I thought I’d share a list of 45 things I’ve learned in 45 years on this planet. These are the kind of things I wish I could have told my younger, twenty-something self when I was anxious about life in general.

But my biggest hope is that maybe one or two of these things will help you, no matter what age you are, or where you are in your life.

 

45 Life Lessons from a 45-Year-Old

1. Find your tribe, and love them fiercely.
2. Spend time with your parents. Maybe more than you want, because one day they will be gone, and it will suck when you can’t pick up the phone to ask them a question, or just say hello.
3. Don’t hold grudges, because they will end up hurting you more than anyone else.
4. Love yourself. And if you’re not there yet, make this your #1 priority.
5. Eat pizza, lots of pizza, especially if you’re in Naples.
6. Travel. It’s the only thing you buy that makes you richer.
7. Do something that scares the shit out of you. Repeat.
8. Always make time for red wine and cheese.
9. Read real books. They are brain food and nurture our souls.
10. Be vulnerable.
11. Laugh at yourself.
12. When you’re pissed, angry, upset or hurt, take pen to paper, and write about it.
13. Be kind to others. You can choose to be a bitch, but it feels a lot better to be kind.
14. Treat your partner, spouse, significant other with kindness, respect and compassion.
15. Every day is a chance to hit the reset button and start over.
16. No one will hand your dreams to you or do the work for you.
17. Stick up for yourself, especially if you’re a woman, especially in the workplace.
18. Dress up when you’re feeling down.
19. Rom-Coms are the greatest invention ever.
20. We all need more time in nature than we are getting.
21. There are certain life skills every adult should know: how to drive a car and how to swim.
22. Always stay hydrated.
23. Exercise is good for you and will make you happier.
24. Life will really suck sometimes. But it always gets better.
25. It’s ok to feel down sometimes.
26. Sitting on your couch, eating ice-cream and watching a movie is a legitimate way to spend a Friday evening.
27. Get serious about your goals. Write them down. Make a plan. Do the work.
28. We need much less stuff than we think we do.
29. Spend time backpacking around the world.
30. Believe in the power of compound interest.
31. Eat your veggies and drink your green smoothies.
32. Never say no to good coffee.
33. Get your sleep, 8 hours if possible. You will feel glorious when you do.
34. Recycle.
35. Drink champagne even when there’s no special occasion.
36. Listen more.
37. Volunteer.
38. Never stop learning.
39. Swim in the ocean as much as possible.
40. Always blow out a candle on your birthday.
41. Wear sunscreen, and apply it often.
42. Take a trip with your friends once a year.
43. Have a sense of humor.
44. Buy yourself fresh flowers.
45. And maybe, most importantly, remember that AGE IS JUST A NUMBER.

Thank you for making it to the bottom of this list! Now I’d love to hear from you. Whatever age you are, what life lessons have you learned and what advice do you want to share?

Please let me know in the comments below.

And if you enjoyed this, then you might be interested in reading my follow up post for my 46th birthday.

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